


Feel Something

by sunnflowers



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Break Up, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Friends With Benefits, NSFW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-11-08
Packaged: 2018-04-30 13:54:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5166269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnflowers/pseuds/sunnflowers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>-Jasper was her closest friend, and although she didn’t like to show it, Peridot was beyond irate by the way Lapis continued to treat her. She wanted better for Jasper, she knew Jasper deserved better.-</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feel Something

Jasper opened her eyes slowly, arching her back on the bed and yawning. Dammit, she thought to herself, I’m awake. She had been for about 20 minutes, but had hoped she could will herself back to the comfort of sleep; it didn’t happen. Whatever, she thought. She stood, quickly stripping out of her pajamas and reaching for a pair of jeans on the floor. She paused at the mirror and looked at her unruly hair and sighed. She grabbed a bra, a t-shirt, and her hair brush and went to work trying to produce someone suitable for being out in public, but it was harder than it looked. Her hair was knotted, and brushing it was just making it worse. She settled for throwing it up in a bun and sighed again. Her eyes looked sunken, dark, and her skin pale. She didn’t have the energy to care. She threw on a hoodie and sandals before walking out of her apartment. 

Six blocks later, she was standing in line at the coffee shop, waiting for her caramel flavored latte with two extra espresso shots. She mumbled her request to the barista, paid, and moved towards the side of the shop. The coffee shop wasn’t overly crowded, it was only about 8:30 on a Sunday morning, but there were still too many people for Jasper’s liking. She shoved her hands in her pockets trying to think about anything that wasn’t Lapis. When that didn’t seem to work out for her, she decided to just stop thinking. Finally, she got her coffee and fled the building. 

Jasper looked down at the ground, her shoulders slouched as she walked, something she had been doing subconsciously since she was a teenager. She was tall and broad, just large enough to be considered intimidating, but not quite large enough to be looked at like an amazon. She desperately tried to make herself seem small, to hide among the crowds on the streets. If only, she could be invisible. She drank her latte as she walked back home, unsure what she was going to do with herself. She entertained the idea of going back to bed. It seemed like the best idea she had, but she had slept all day yesterday, and she guessed it wasn’t healthy. 

As she entered her apartment, she stood in the doorway looking at the state of her life. She needed to clean, badly, but she wasn’t all that motivated. She pulled off her hoodie and threw it on the couch while picking up some other clothing. She managed to round up all the sweatshirts, t-shirts, and pull-overs and threw them in the direction of her hamper in her room. Next she went for the dishes, piling each into the sink along with the utensils. She sat on the couch and looked around the room. At least it looked better, she thought to herself, ignoring the dishes she needed to clean, the laundry she needed to do, and the fact she hadn’t taken out the vacuum in weeks. Instead, she decided on playing a videogame. 

Jasper tried to focus on the game, but she would eventually realize she had let her mind wander again. She paused the game before pulling her legs under her on the couch. This had become a rather ridiculous Sunday ritual. She tried to keep her mind off of Lapis, but inevitably, she was all Jasper could think about. Just then, a loud knock on the door startled Jasper out of her thoughts. She opened it to find none other than Lapis Lazuli standing in the doorway. “You look like hell,” Jasper said, eyeing the thin girl. “You’re charming,” Lapis replied taking a step into the apartment and leaning against the door frame. She smiled at Jasper with a sly grin without saying another word. Jasper stared. She had no idea why Lapis had shown up, but she knew giving in to ask would ensure things did not end in her favor. So, she stared at the freshly dyed blue hair and the thin frame under a sweatshirt a size too large. She stared and she waited, she waited for whatever Lapis had planned. 

Lapis’ eyes sparkled as she took a step closer to Jasper. She pressed her hands against Jasper’s chest and she leaned towards her. “I missed you,” Lapis said with a smile. Jasper knew she was being used for something, but she wasn’t sure what. She pushed Lapis away gently before speaking, “Why are you here?” Lapis flashed a fake pout before speaking, “You say it like you don’t enjoy seeing me Jasper! I’m hurt.” Jasper bit her tongue trying to keep from saying one of the several nasty remarks that came to mind. “I wanted to see you. I told you already, I missed you.” Jasper took a step back, eyeing the smaller figure and wondering about her real agenda. “You left me, Lapis. You decided you were done. You wanted nothing to do with me. Why are you here?” Lapis smiled in a way that Jasper knew meant trouble. Lapis was never up this early, meaning she must not have been to bed yet. She was also never this quiet, at least not when she had something to say. When it finally clicked, Jasper was sorely disappointed in the smaller woman. 

Jasper glared at Lapis, “You’re high.” She spoke her words with a disappointed tone and walked back to the couch, not bothering with the door. She picked up her videogame where she left off. She heard the door close just before Lapis planted herself next to Jasper on the couch. “Only a little! And that has nothing to do with me coming to see you,” Lapis explained. Jasper fixed her eyes on the television and clenched her jaw. She was certain she would regret anything she said in that moment. “Come on! I just want to talk Jasper. Please?” Jasper clicked the button to pause her game and threw the controller down with more force than she intended. Her jaw still clenched, she looked over at the blue haired woman on the couch. 

Lapis brushed the hair from her face and smiled at Jasper. “Can’t we talk about this?” She was waiting for Jasper to say something, but she just looked back, jaw clenched and eyes stern. Lapis leaned forward to take Jasper’s hand. “I miss you. Don’t you miss me?” She ran her fingers gently over Jasper’s as she spoke the words softly. Finally, Jasper couldn’t stand it any longer. She pulled her hand from Lapis’ grip. “Every fucking second of every fucking day Lapis. But it doesn’t matter. I’m never getting you back. You’re someone else now, and I know better than to let this new you use me. Now if all you wanted was to fuck with me, you’ve done a great job. Will there be anything else?” 

Lapis’ eyes grew wide and for once, she wasn’t sure what to say. She wasn’t expecting this conversation to go this way. Her head had been heavy as she left the party and all she wanted was to feel the warmth and comfort of someone close to her. She walked aimlessly and was surprised herself to realize she was at Jasper’s apartment. “Jasper,” she said softly, “You don’t really mean that.” But Jasper’s sharp golden eyes said she meant all of it. “Go crash at Pearl’s place. I’m not doing this,” She replied before she turned away from the small framed woman. This time Jasper’s tone had changed. It was soft, almost heart broken, shaky, as if it took everything she had to get the words out. Lapis silently picked herself up from the couch and left the apartment, closing the door behind her with the softest click. 

Jasper once again tucked her legs underneath herself and stared at the TV screen. She barely noticed the first few tears drop from her cheeks. She dug into her pocket and pulled out her phone. She thought about texting Pearl, about warning her that Lapis may be stopping by in a less than sober state, but she decided against it. After all, she and Pearl weren’t really friends, and it would be better to stay out of whatever business Lapis had. She lazily scrolled through her contacts until her finger landed on one Peridot. Jasper checked the time and figured it was late enough. She swiped a quick message and dropped the phone beside her. 

Jasper: Come by if you’ve got time?

The tears continued to fall and Jasper continued to ignore them. After all, what was the point of doing anything about them? They would continue to fall until she was equally as frustrated by Lapis as she was with her inability to control her emotions. Jasper knew she has done the “right” thing. Lapis had played this card over and over, “I miss you”, “I wanted to see you”, “I was thinking about you”, and Jasper had fallen for it more than once. But inevitably, it turned out to just be a selfish attempt by Lapis to drown the guilt, loneliness, and emptiness she felt consuming her. Jasper’s touch would be enough to absolve her conscience of its wrongdoing and Lapis would be content for another several days. And inevitably Jasper would feel worse than before, knowing that Lapis really was indifferent to her feelings. Jasper heard her phone’s low beep and she picked it up. 

Peridot: Be there in 15?

Jasper sighed. As much as telling Lapis to get out was the “right” move, texting Peridot was the “wrong” one, but she didn’t care. She ran her hands through her bleached blond hair coming across one of the knots she hadn’t handled that morning. Dammit. Jasper liked to tell herself that she and Peridot had a “friends with benefits” relationship, but that wasn’t entirely true. She stood up and walked to the bathroom, sheading her clothes on the bathroom floor and stepping into the shower. She and Peridot’s relationship was nothing similar. Jasper allowed Peridot to use her for sex and in return, Jasper tried to make herself believe she could feel something. The warm water cascaded through Jasper’s hair as she dumped shampoo into her fingers before running it through the tangled blond mess. It wasn’t as if she and Peridot weren’t friends, they were. But their physical relationship was one where they both dissociated from themselves and simply went through the motions; Peridot for the feeling of being with someone, and Jasper to reinforce her charade that everything was fine. She pulled the comb through her hair a few times before rinsing off and exiting the shower. Gathering the clothing off the bathroom floor, she carried them to her room and dropped them in the previously started pile. She stood in the mirror, towel drying her hair. Eyes not puffy, but certainly red, face still sunken and pale; she was unsure if it was an improvement over this morning or not. 

She heard a knock at the door just as she had finished throwing on a bra and soccer shorts. As she opened the door, Peridot pushed by her dropping her messenger bag next to the couch and heading for the kitchen with a brown bag. “Damn you’re beautiful, why don’t you always answer the door looking like that?” Peridot said, not bothering to look back at Jasper. The small woman had sunny blond hair and piercing green eyes, but they were both unnoticeable as she bent under the counter rummaging for something. “What’s in the bag Per?” Jasper asked, ignoring the comments about her body. “Tequila, expensive tequila. Why can’t I find your shot glasses?” Jasper rolled her eyes and walked into the kitchen, pulling down two shot glasses from the top shelf. “Because I wouldn’t keep shot glasses under the sink?” She replied placing them in front of the brown bag. “Ah. Quite reasonable I suppose.” Peridot poured two shots and handed one to Jasper. “Cheers love.” They both swallowed the alcohol and placed the glasses back on the counter. 

“What happened?” Peridot said, not bothering to face Jasper. “Lazuli showed up … and I told her to get out.” Peridot frowned in the way only she could, her entire face showing her displeasure without any muscles moving. “It’s awfully early for her isn’t it?” “She was high, obviously hadn’t gone to bed yet,” Jasper replied, shifting her weight and leaning against the counter. “What did she want?” Peridot asked, putting the tequila on top of the cabinet and throwing out the bag. Jasper shrugged, “Doesn’t matter. I told her to go see Pearl because I wasn’t dealing with her today.” Peridot stood in the silence, watching as Jasper’s face spoke to her emotions. After a few moments she approached the taller woman and ran her hands over Jasper’s uncovered stomach. Without a word, she leaned forward and kissed her, waiting for Jasper to relax and join her. Jasper wrapped her arms around Peridot’s waist and kissed back, tasting the sharp taste of tequila on her lips. 

Peridot let her nails graze lightly down Jasper’s back before pushing her fingertips under the taller woman’s sports bra. Jasper leaned downed to allow Peridot to pull it over her head before reaching for Peridot’s shirt. Peridot stopped her, running her nails over Jasper’s nipples before taking one between her lips and flicking it with her tongue. Peridot was enamored by Japser’s body and Jasper was taken by Peridot’s skill and lack of inhibition. Peridot released Jasper’s nipple from her mouth as the taller woman let out a soft moan. Peridot looked up into Jasper’s eyes, “As much as I’d like to fuck you here on the counter … we both know the height difference might be a problem.” Jasper pulled off Peridot’s shirt and slid the cups of her bra upward, watching as her breasts spilled out underneath. Gently, she unclasped the hooks before pulling it past Peridot’s arms and tossing it to the floor with her shirt. Peridot gave a half smile, “Alright, now we’re even,” She said as she walked slowly out of the room. 

Jasper paused to feel the charge Peridot left on her body. It made her feel grounded, like she was alive and part of this world around her. She looked up to see Peridot disappear around the doorframe into the bedroom. Jasper followed, slowly picking up Peridot’s clothes and carrying them into the room with her. Peridot was perched on the edge of the bed, legs crossed, watching the door, waiting for Jasper. As the taller woman entered, Peridot stood and met her in the middle of the floor. Peridot reached up and wrapped her arms around Jasper’s neck, pushing herself up on her toes to get a better reach. “Do you want to stop?” she asked, her eyes kind and understanding. Jasper leaned down, pressing her sharp teeth into Peridot’s neck. As the green eyed woman tilted her head back, a deep moan escaped her throat. Jasper released her grip on Peridot and whispered softly, “no.” 

Peridot opened her eyes and collected herself before stepping aside, gesturing towards the bed. Jasper obediently sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Peridot to step towards her. Peridot stood between Jasper’s legs and ran her fingers through the soft blond hair. “You’re beautiful,” she said as she tipped Japser’s head up towards her. She watched as Jasper blushed, but before she could speak, Peridot pressed their lips together, savoring the feeling of the soft skin. As they kissed, Jasper ran her fingers over Peridot’s stomach, raking her nails against the skin and pressing the pads of her fingers into her hips. Eventually, her fingers reached the button at the top of Peridot’s jeans. Jasper quickly undid the button and zipper before slowly pulling them down. Her eyes widened slightly as she noticed Peridot wasn’t wearing any underwear. Their eyes met and Peridot gave a weak smile. “I … didn’t see the point.” She stepped out of her jeans and sandals before pulling gently at Jasper’s shorts. The taller woman stood, allowing Peridot to easily pull the shorts off. As she did, Peridot swiped her finger gently over Jasper’s sex. “Didn’t see the point either?” Peridot asked softly before pinning Jasper to the bed. 

Jasper’s eyes closed as Peridot took one of Jasper’s nipples between her lips. She pushed her tongue against it watching as Jasper winced slightly before sighing. Peridot laced her fingers through Jasper’s hair then tightly grasped the blond locks in her fist. Jasper let her head be tilted back, exposing her neck to Peridot’s tongue. Jasper let out a small whimper as she felt the cool tongue lick against her now very warm skin. As Peridot worked on Jasper’s neck, Jasper softly thumbed Peridot’s nipples. Peridot’s chest was small and beautifully proportionate to her body. Jasper loved how her breasts sat perfectly perched on her chest, perky and inviting. Jasper knew Peridot’s nipples were sensitive, enough so that the soft petting Jasper was doing, caused Peridot to moan between bites of Jasper’s neck. She allowed it for a while, but soon, Peridot got impatient. She tugged at the tangled mess of hair in her fingers, eliciting a groan from Jasper. Peridot held Jasper’s head back as she reached down with her other hand between the larger woman’s legs. Jasper tried, but couldn’t make eye contact with Peridot, she could only stare at the ceiling or close her eyes while the assault continued on her neck, while a finger landed between her legs every once in a while. 

Jasper groaned audibly; she felt incredibly exposed with Peridot in control of her head, but in a way, it was everything she needed right this moment. Suddenly, Peridot’s mouth landed on Jasper’s nipples again. Jasper could feel the warmth building in her core, how wet she was becoming and the sharp pangs of desire that started in her chest every time Peridot flicked at her nipple with her tongue. She clenched her teeth as she moaned tracing her fingers over Peridot’s hips, circling her thumbs over the tendons leading into her groin. “Perrrridot …” Jasper moaned quietly, eyes closed. The smaller woman looked towards Jasper, distracted by the sound of her name. She took in the sight of her broad shoulders pinned to the bed, head tipped back, and back slightly arched to take some of the pressure off her neck. Jasper looked incredibly sexy … so Peridot just stared. When Jasper realized Peridot had stopped forcing her head back, she cautiously tilted it forward, locking eyes with the shining green gems. 

Jasper saw the gleam and the wicked smile, it was one of the sexier things about Perdiot, at least she thought so. She knew what was about to come, some request Jasper was better off just following. Peridot slid gently off of Jasper and smiled. “Get up. Kneel please.” Jasper let her shoulders lay flat against the bed for a moment, taking in a deep breath and basking in the almost overwhelming feeling of tension between them. Peridot was patient, knowing Jasper would oblige in time. When Jasper had gotten up, Peridot arranged her body to her liking, facing the headboard, legs apart. Peridot knelt behind Jasper as she began to kiss and bit softly down the broad shoulders and solid back. As Peridot reached Jasper’s waist, the taller woman squirmed. Peridot made certain to spend extra time on the less sensitive skin, kissing and licking until she had turned even the most unresponsive part of Jasper’s waist into an estrogen hot spot. 

Jasper rested her hands against the headboard and pressed her forehead against them. Her eyes closed as she let Peridot have her way, teasing Jasper with her oral skills. Finally, Peridot reached between Jasper’s legs and ran her finger up towards Jasper’s clit. She watched as Jasper arched her back, silently begging for attention at her core. Peridot took her other hand and turned Jasper’s head to face her. Pressing her forehead against the other’s she spoke in a soft almost soothing tone, “You’re really quite wet Jasper.” Jasper’s eyes fluttered between open and half closed, looking into Peridot’s eyes. “And super sexy with that look on your face.” Jasper didn’t speak, she nudged her head into Peridot’s neck and let out a soft moaning whimper. “I know,” Peridot said gently, “you’ll get to come soon beautiful. I promise.” Peridot kissed Jasper’s exposed neck before licking her finger seductively. 

Peridot adjusted herself so she was straddling Jasper’s thigh, one hand locked tightly in the bleached hair while the other was positioned between Jasper’s legs. She slid one finger slowly into Jasper’s core and watched as Jasper moaned resting her head once more against the headboard. Peridot could feel Japser’s body quiver slightly underneath her as she pushed the pad of her finger against the soft walls of Jasper’s core. She pulled Jasper’s head towards her, whispering into the taller woman’s ear, “Such a lovely sound. Think I could hear it again?” She pressed her finger back into Jasper and was rewarded with another loud moan from the woman beneath her. Peridot let her legs slide slightly outward, pressing her wet clit into Jasper’s thigh. As she did, she let out a soft moan. Jasper slowly reach up, wrapping her arm around Peridot’s waist, pulling her body closer. “Shit,” Peridot whispered as she felt her entire body charge with sexual energy. 

Jasper closed her eyes and tried to relax her body, focusing on the feeling of Peridot’s clit pressed against her thigh. Her fingers traced patterns against the small woman’s back, occasionally reaching up to play with her hair. Perdiot on the other hand had precise and measured movements. She pulled Jasper’s head closer to her before slowly raking her teeth over the taller woman’s earlobe. Peridot listened as Jasper’s moans grew louder and smiled to herself. Peridot was fond of having the power to turn Jasper to a quivering mess, enjoying the uncontrolled sounds her powers produced. She returned two fingers to Jasper’s body, this time pressing against one of the spots that made Jasper cry out with need. “P-peri-peridot!” Jasper whimpered, clenching the headboard between her fingers. The smaller woman tilted Japser’s head towards her and whispered, “How are you feeling?” Jasper couldn’t form sentences, the feeling of Peridot’s fingers at her core was overwhelming. She whined quietly, but Peridot wouldn’t take that for an answer. “Tell me Jasper, how does it feel to have my fingers inside you?” 

When Peridot didn’t hear an answer she tilted her head to look at Jasper. Her eyes were closed tightly and she was breathing heavily, trying no doubt to keep herself from being too loud. Peridot let her thumb find its way to Jasper’s clit and the silence was broken. Jasper moaned as she pressed her forehead once again against the headboard. As Peridot pressed her own body against Jasper’s she asked again, “How are you doing Jasper?” This time she got a muffled response, “Sooo close.” Peridot let out a half giggle half moan, “God, I love watching you come Jasper, you know that?” She pressed her lips against Jasper’s ear and ground her hips into Jasper’s thigh. A deep moan stuck in Peridot’s throat eliciting a sigh from Jasper. “Damn Per,” Jasper whispered. Peridot knew how sensitive Jasper’s ears where, she also knew that the sound of her moaning alone could send Jasper over the edge. She couldn’t help it, Jasper just looked too gorgeous. Peridot twisted her body and pulled at Jasper’s hair forcing their lips to meet in a deep kiss. As she did, Jasper dug her fingers into Peridot’s shoulder. Their kiss lasted long enough to distract both women from what they had been doing prior. Fingers were still, muscles were relaxed, for a second all that was left was the afterglow of a perfect kiss. 

Peridot was first to come back to the reality of the situation, her clit throbbing and begging for attention. She rolled her hips towards Jasper and let out a groan as three of her fingers found their way to the perfect spot forcing Jasper to arch her back and beg for Peridot to continue. Jasper’s nails clawed at Peridot’s back and the smaller woman groaned with pleasure. “Please!” Jasper cried unable to control her moaning any longer. “Ughhhhh P-ppeerrrr please!” Peridot tightened her grip on Jasper’s hair and the taller woman let out another moan. As Peridot continued to grind her hips into Jasper, she softly whispered in a shaky voice, lips press against the outside of Jasper’s ear, “I-I’m … I’m g-gonna … ugh, Jasper!” As Peridot approached her orgasm, she intently pressed her fingers into Jasper’s core, working every spot she knew Jasper couldn’t ignore. Her thumb softly danced over the taller woman’s clit and just as Peridot’s eyes were forced closed by her climax, Jasper dug her nails into Peridot’s back, letting out a sharp cry followed by a deep moan. 

Peridot opened her eyes, her forehead resting against Jasper’s shoulder. She could hear Jasper’s soft panting as she continued to gently tease the larger woman’s clit. Jasper’s body was shaking and Peridot knew she was close to another orgasm. She whispered softly, trying to get Jasper to relax, but she knew she wouldn’t feel Jasper’s body relax beneath her until she had worn herself out. With a gentle flick of Peridot’s thumb, Jasper came once again. This time, with a muffled cry through clenched teeth. With barely a moment between, Jasper came again as Peridot’s fingers pressed deep into her body. As Jasper came down from her last orgasm, Peridot gently pulled her towards the bed. She felt Jasper’s body relax against her as they cuddled for a short moment. “You alright?” Peridot asked, a staple of their encounters together but still a genuine question. She watched as Jasper bit her lip and mumbled an uhmm hmmm. She pulled the blanket over Jasper and kissed her cheek softly before disappearing into the bathroom to shower. 

Jasper pulled the blanket around her shoulders and listened as the water in the bathroom ran. Every time she and Peridot had sex it was the same. She would curl up under the blanket, Peridot would go shower. Once Peridot came back, she would worry about how Jasper was doing and kiss her deeply, trying to convey her love and concern. After Jasper convinced Peridot she was okay, she would go take a shower, then they would curl up on the couch and watch a movie as if nothing happened between them. What Jasper didn’t know was that while she showered, Peridot would pace the room, trying to calm the anger that would inevitably rise within her. Jasper was in fact her closest friend, and although she didn’t like to show it, Peridot was beyond irate by the way Lapis continued to treat her. She wanted better for Jasper, she knew Jasper deserved better. And every time she looked into Jasper’s broken, gold eyes, Peridot wanted to cry. But somehow she was able to get her anger under control before Jasper returned. She pushed the thoughts of Lapis out of her mind and resumed spending time with Jasper. Eventually, she would see Jasper genuinely smile. Peridot waited for this moment, the moment she was certain that this encounter with Lapis would not be the one to break Jasper. The moment she was certain Jasper would keep fighting to get through this.


End file.
